Which Mando?
by 1-1 Marines
Summary: Inspired by 7-hot Feanorian's Which Mando. Rated T for safety.


**ME: Inspired by 7-hot Feanorian's _Which Mando_ , illustrating the chief issue with the portrayal of Mandalorians in The Clone Wars. Haven't watched The Antilles Extraction yet, so no spoilers, please.**

Two figures were standing in the open. One was a Mandalorian mercenary in gold armor, while the other was a Jedi Knight wearing robes and armor plates on her upper body.

"Hello," said the mercenary. "I'm Sergeant Kal Skirata from the popular science-fiction franchise Star Wars."

"And I'm General Etain Tur-Mukan from the same franchise," said the Jedi Knight. "We're here to talk to you today about the portrayal of Mandalorians in Star Wars: The Clone Wars."

"While a great and entertaining show for the whole family," Kal elaborated, "The Clone Wars had its flaws. Of course, the same can be said for the Republic Commando novels written by Karen Traviss that Etain and I starred in, as well as practically any decent fictional work. But there are some flaws that stand out more than others."

"Of course, _Kal'buir_ ," said Etain. "One thing that definitely stands out in The Clone Wars is the portrayal of the Mandalorians as a people."

"Indeed," Kal said in a low voice. "Two factions got all the Mandalorian screen time in The Clone Wars. The first group is the self-styled New Mandalorians, a society of pacifists whose leader, Duchess Satine Kryze, proclaimed their independence and neutrality from the Republic and the war before begging said Republic for free handouts after she set literally an entire warehouse's worth of evidence on fire. The second group is Death Watch, the violent 'we want to establish a dictatorship and rule with an iron fist' splinter group of the _Mando'ade_."

Etain nodded and brought out a holoprojector. The first video she displayed was Satine ordering a warehouse full of smuggled goods burnt to the ground and threatening to charge the senior policeman on the scene with being complicit in the conspiracy when he protested, even though logic would dictate that he would want to cut his losses in the event of being a conspirator and destroy the evidence to avoid being implicated. The second was of Death Watch using droids for target practice to sate their sadism and kidnapping women from a local village. The third video consisted of the New Mandalorian police force being overwhelmed by an invasion of Sundari by armed criminals, only for Death Watch to "deal with" said criminals and make themselves look like heroes in the eyes of the police and citizenry.

"So there you have it," Etain said after she put away the holoprojector. "Clone Wars, unfortunately, had only two Mandalorian factions-a group of wimpy pacifists that don't last five minutes in a fight even if they have weapons, and a group of violent terrorists who want to rule over said wimpy pacifists."

"Indeed," Kal said. "Sure, the Mandalorians weren't perfect in the Republic Commando novels either. There were those like Dred Priest and Isabet Reau, both of whom I'd have gladly shot myself. There were those like Vau, who I hated for a long time. Then there were guys like me. But we weren't cardboard cutouts by comparison to the Fake Mandos and Death Watch. At least there were Mandos you could legitimately root for."

A group of various beings, including two Jedi, walked into the area. "Hey, what are you guys doing here?" Kal said, annoyed but polite enough to not call them _aruetiise_. "This is our PSA."

"Well, we do have a Mandalorian warrior on our team," said Kanan, the leader of the group. "Rest assured that Rebels at least is giving _one_ of you guys screentime, at least that might be something for the Mandalorian fans."

Kal: "Wren, you could really use more coverage when it comes to plates," he said.

"Hey," Sabine protested, "at least I, unlike others, wear a helmet for once."

"True," Kal said. "Too many people fail to wear helmets. A _buy'ce_ can save your life if you get shot in the head, which I heard happened to you."

"Yup," Sabine winced. "Wasn't fun, but thanks to it I survived."

Etain nodded. "In spite of Concord Dawn ending up with a third of it blown away and turned into the asteroids," she said, "there may be hope yet for the _Mando'ade_ under Disney."

"Yup," Zeb said. "Between Sabine, the Protectors, and the Imperial Mandalorians? You guys may never show up in the show, but _karabast_ , you're definitely getting better treated this time around as a culture."

Kanan extended his hand to Kal. "Good luck, Sergeant. May the Force be with you and your clan."

Remarkably enough, Kal not only shook it but said, "Same to you, _Jetii_."

The two groups then parted ways.

 **ME: A/N: I probably should've worked on TFM or TECD instead, but hey, taking potshots at the New Mandalorians never gets old. Any ideas sent via PM or review will be taken into consideration. Hope you guys liked this.**


End file.
